It’s “everywhere.” In emails. In op-eds in reputable newspapers. In reports, statements, and press releases. It’s completely taken over Linkedin. Balkan, who’s cited above, finds it annoying. It’s overwhelming to me, frankly.

If you’re not using AI, you’re the weird one now. That overly assertive, dry voice isn’t going anywhere. Abuses of the word ‘strategic’ will continue unchecked. Cringe worthy deployments of ‘it’s not just X —it’s Y’ might abate, simply because it’s such a tell. (That would be a small mercy at least.) But fundamentally the battle feels lost: AI isn’t just ubiquitous —it’s unstoppable.

We’re nearly in August. This is the time of year when I dream up ways to properly evaluate students who increasingly rely on bots to research and write their papers. In my syllabi, I explain that being able to do your own research and writing will make you stand out. I remind them that AI makes stuff up. Yet I know that I’ll still be adding comments like “I have no idea where you got this idea” when grading. So far, I’m thinking that good ol’ closed book, hand written exams are my best bet.

Admittedly, I’m a bit of Luddite. I still enter my footnotes manually; I could never get into citation software. My first thought when I open Word isn’t to call up Co-pilot, but to check that my quotation marks will be in the right format, since I usually write in English, but have a French keyboard. I’ve given up hope that Microsoft will solve that annoyance.

I’m not an anti-AI fanatic. It’s useful for transcription and translation. Maybe it can make sure that the articles I submit to academic journals fit the house style. That would be a godsend.

What I can’t do is ask an AI to write something from scratch or even polish something I’ve written. I can’t put my name on things that don’t sound like me, ticks and typos included.

I decided to write this after I saw an Abacus poll on trust in AI. Unsurprisingly, there’s a generational divide over the issue. It used to be my ‘golden era’ Simpsons references that aged me in front of my students. In the coming years, it’ll be weightier questions like what counts as authorship and what skills are worth honing. I’m not sure how convincing I’ll be, considering how dominant that self-assured, error-prone voice has become.